Now It’s Personal

May 18, 2011 § 6 Comments

Goodness gracious, somehow I am beginning my 24th year of being alive already! I feel like the older I get, the faster time goes. My birthday was actually surprisingly nice! I had been dreading it because honestly being far away from my family & basically people who cared are quite far away. But I’ve been so lucky to meet some people down here who cared too! It was a nice, quiet, & small birthday & I felt so special. It meant a lot especially because I’ve been having such a rough time lately missing home & being stressed from school & my plant isn’t doing well & just being a bit lonely in general.

I guess I was feeling a bit down especially because I had been feeling like I wasn’t doing much in the way of personal growth. I think this year was unique in the sense that usually, I am doing so much internal change, but this time there were so many external changes that I had trouble keeping up.

In my 23rd year

  • I graduated college!
  • left my longest held job
  • Saw a friend of mine that I’d known since high school get married & thought, “awwwwhhh” a lot
  • Briefly played softball even though I hate sports because I liked the people who were playing
  • made friends with the ex
  • had probably 3,000,000,000 chocolate milkshakes at Fat Jack’s
  • got to see for probably the last time, the free Shakespeare plays in Woodward Park
  • went to a trillion parties, realized that I do, in fact, not hate parties
  • visited Los Angeles to see where I would be living, ended up at Disneyland instead
  • wrote wrote wrote
  • tried to learn to swim again (failed, seriously someone help me!)
  • watched lots of movies
  • moved to Los Angeles
  • got a new job (yeah I was unemployed for the whole summer, it was fun, I was poor)
  • unmade friends with the ex
  • dyed my hair many many many times
  • made new friends
  • started grad school
  • briefly dated someone, got dumped before I even knew where I stood with the guy. Initially was sad, now I can’t find it anything but hilarious
  • began volunteering!
  • was a power ranger for Halloween with new friends
  • went to lots of museums
  • became hooked on coffee
  • did lots of work in class that was challenging/heartbreaking/fulfilling
  • got my wallet stolen for the first time ever
  • experienced, “the guy that randomly never called back” (rude!)
  • was “the girl that randomly never called back” to someone else (more rude! I know that I know better than to behave that way)
  • Disneyland again!
  • saw some pretty great bands/musicians. LA has some nice venues (there, I said something nice about you, city that I am not terribly fond of)
  • sort of figured out LA’s public transportation system (it’s kind of a disaster), also lost my bus pass kind of a lot of times
  • put a hole in my ear, aggravated it with a sweater, freaked out about it being infected & cried my eyes out like a big baby, was helped out by a friend, all is well
  • kept on creating!

I mean really, it was a pretty insane year for me now that I’ve taken the time to actually look back on it. But you know, even though I still feel like I’m playing catch up to the external changes in my life, I’m feeling pretty good about where I am right now. One of the things I am told pretty often by people I meet is, “you seem pretty independent”. This makes me really happy because I think it is my number one survival skill & a quality that I like about myself. Randomly moving to a place where I didn’t know anyone really has put that independence to its limits. & yes, I do get lonely a lot, I think that’s normal though considering the situation. With every day that passes I am getting a tiny bit tougher (grrrrrr), smarter, stronger, and freer (is this a word? Should I retract the smarter statement?). To me, personal growth is about constantly becoming a better version of yourself & I think I grew more than I initially realized. I am so happy that everyone who was a part of my 23rd year was there, whether it was a positive or negative interaction, making it so unique & definitely a year I won’t forget, even when I am a little granny.

So hello, 24th year, we are just a few days in, it’s nice to meet you. I’ve had some pretty amazing years so you have a lot to live up to, but I have no doubt you will. You are so full of unknown possibilities & I find that incredibly exciting. Looking forward to experiencing everything you have in store!

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§ 6 Responses to Now It’s Personal

  • Meg says:

    I LOVE this. 🙂

    And maybe it’s just because I’m a nomad myself (I move every three years like clockwork), but moving far away from your safety net and making your own life is just the best way to figure out who and what you truly are. You get to see the world, meet new people, and are forced out of your comfort zone so you’re always growing and learning and exploring. That is what life is all about. You’re doing great! ♥

    • Denise says:

      Seriously, after having moved down here, I feel like I can live anywhere! & I feel like I want to try out so many different places! For a few years at least. It’s kind of odd that even though I’m not a fan of Los Angeles, I really do feel like making the decision to move here was one of the better choices I have ever made.

      • Meg says:

        It is. LA doesn’t have to be your forever home, but it’s a good first step to anywhere in the world. If you can make it in this big city, then you can make it anywhere!

        Coincidentally, if you ever want to visit me once I move to Paris, you are always welcome to my home. And I would love the company!

        • Denise says:

          Oh man, I would love to visit! I’ve never been out of the country before! I was planning on getting a passport this summer due to suffering the repercussions of being completely ID-less after my wallet got stolen, maybe I’ll be able to put that to use!

  • Meg B. says:

    We’ll work on swimming, OK?

    ❤ Happy Birthday love!

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